Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
