Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize