he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You left your underwear on the fireplace
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
