Midget sex pt 2 tonight
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
