all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
