Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize