I understand Curling. That high.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
