I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
