before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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