Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
