hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
