Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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