so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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