i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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