I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
