I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize