what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
