you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
