in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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