Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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