You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
