The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I will be naked everywhere
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
