Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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