Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize