your thong is hanging out like whoa
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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