Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
