Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
