Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
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