He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
