i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
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