Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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