that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
