My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
