in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
