It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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