You work out of a Hotel?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
