Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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