Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
