That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
