Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you didnt know i had herpes?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
