booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
