Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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