i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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