You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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