I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
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