they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
