I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
