I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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