i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
it was like having sex with a tree stump
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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