where am i from again
Barsexuality is the new black.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
