At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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