i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
